As all readers will know, New York has four seasons–winter, spring, summer and fall–each with their own temperature profile. In December, we expect cold and bitter weather, and in April we expect 70 degree days. This year, however, the temperature has been fluctuating each day, making it completely unpredictable.
One day, students will be wearing parkas and trudging in snow boots, or enjoying a rare snow day. The next, the math hallway smells sweatier and more disgusting than that locked room in Student Activities (but that’s a story for next time).
“I have no idea what to wear every day! Even the weather app has no idea what’s going on,” an anonymous source claimed.
But the weather is more dangerous than a few missed outfits or uncomfortable days. A few years ago, the sky turned orange, shocking many and causing panic. The putrid smell and vibrant colors stuck in everyone’s mind for a while, but, as all things are, were eventually forgotten.
On Friday, March 13th, the sixth anniversary of the COVID shutdown, the sky once again changed color. The pale blue became politician orange, throwing the world into a tailspin.
At first, shock was the primary emotion, students and teachers remarking on the strangeness. The first two days, all sporting events were canceled as scientists raced to determine the cause. Unlike last year, no matter how many times it was tested, the air quality remained normal, and no negative health effects were suspected. Everything else was suspiciously identical, besides the color of the world.
As a result, the world went (almost) back to normal. One administrator even described the color as a “unique shake-up.” It seemed like the only ones who cared were the Earth science teachers, who remarked in distress, “how can I teach about the sky when there is no sky?!”
We have acclimated. The disgruntled earth science teachers figured out the new weather, poets will exalt the joy of shining orange, and math teachers will keep giving pop-tarts as a reward for survival.
And it’s important to note that the weather has gone completely back to normal.
